Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Bandit the Panda

Only in a semi-boring town could a baby panda become the hottest ticket in town, but I have to admit I succumbed to the madness (as well as the cuteness) and reserved my tickets for a viewing in January.

So what is it about this little creature that causes me to waste time at work watching the Panda-Cam? Tai Shan is dead sexy, and he even has a blog to prove it. The true, original blog for Tai Shan is authored by his inner wild child -Bandit the Panda. All other blogs are inadequate - don't get it twisted.

I have been a fan of the site for a few months now. Bandit the Panda is crazy, sexy, cool and uses the word clownmunch a lot, which I like. He also has his own online store of Bandit merchandise.

I noticed that Bandit has a whole staff of people working with him, including a publicist, editor, personal trainer, and security. But one position was not filled - stylist. And who better to step in as Bandit's personal stylist than VP of Dior!

I pulled together a quick application and posted it in hopes Bandit would see. He's super busy playing around with old Michelin tires and outsmarting foxes, but he read my application and offered me the job! From Inner Monologue of Bandit the Panda:

I never knew I needed a personal stylist...

...until I read this. I asked Mom if she thought I should hire a stylist. She honked about my ego getting out of hand or whatnot, but I really think she's just jealous.This person has put together a pretty tight application, so I've copied it here and want everyone to welcome VP of Dior to the staff.

Name: VP of Dior
Position Applying For: Personal Stylist
Qualifications: First, let me say your coat is amazing. Black and white is always in. Black is especially making a comeback this year, BTW. I have been a slave to fashion for 23 yrs and believe that one's personal style should represent taste and passion. I have styled myself, family members, clueless ex-boyfriends, doggie companions, and hapless sorority sisters in need. My biggest client was Dolly, the cloned sheep, who I inspired to embrace the wonders of Diane von Furstenberg wrap dresses.

DC is not known for its fashion savvy. Do not fret--I will make you even more bad-ass and avoid anything that resembles a Brooks Brother wool sweater. I see you rockin' a younger, polished version of Brad Pitt's style (let's face it you're just as hot as Pitt!). The Denim Bar in A-Town has fabulous distressed jeans that will look great on that little tushy (no doubt the time with the trainer is paying off!). Perhaps mix a D-squared bomber jacket with a new t-shirt from your own line, and throw in Dior shades. And to keep things down to earth pair it with a vintage brim hat from Eastern Market. You would be the most stylin mofo up in that zoo piece!

If you are not sure about this style, I will gladly listen to your wants and needs. I shall avoid any designers who use fur, including the heinous J-Lo. I hope you like my vision and it would be my great honor to style you.

I actually noticed she has a blog of her own, so I'm adding it to the links on my sidebar. I think I'd look pretty badass in a bomber jacket riding around town on my chopper, so that's cool. I think I might look a bit like a tool in jeans, but hey who really knows about these things until they try them. My fur is the most important priority for me. Mom makes it pink when she licks me, which is NOT cool. Ok VP of Dior, do your thing--make her stop!

Bandit, I am delighted to be on your team and working hard to maintain your star status. As soon as the new year begins I will sit down and map out your 2006 style agenda!


Blogger Bandit said...

AWWWright! Thanks for the shout-out, VP. It's great to have quality people around me, especially when my only friend at the zoo is currently being a clownmunch and is all annoyed that I stole his pinup girl and posted it for everyone to laugh at.

Seriously, and I can ask you this because you would know--but who wears a leaf shawl-thingy anymore?

4:15 PM  
Blogger VP of Dior said...

No one in their right state of mind would wear a leaf-shawl. The perons runs the risk of looking like Rambo hiding in the jungle.

Pashminas are still "in" and although expensive, will remain a classy way to wrap fabric around one's upper body.

4:36 PM  

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